NEWS | New collection from fashion house EDL is panned by critics in Hyde

February 25, 2012


EDL fashion spokesman: "Our Spring/Summer 2012 collection is all about caps, eyes being too close together, fear of change, a lack of intelligence, bad tattoos and general racist twattery."

Today saw the launch of the new Spring/Summer 2012 clothing collection from Luton-based fashion house EDL.

The clothing label and cunt collective shunned the traditional catwalks of Milan and London and instead chose a pub car park in Hyde to display their new collection.

Mark Chonch is EDL’s Head of Fashion and Complete Twattery. He spoke to News Manc about the inspiration and meaning behind the new range.

“The collection is identified by classic touches of signature EDL that we all know and hate”, explained Chonch.

“There is a wonderful lightweight blue tracksuit trouser which looks just fabulous with a pair of Reebok classics. Another new piece is a white hooded top with an England flag on it. EDL’s Director of Fuckery Gary Hooper designed that one after thinking about England and how good it was before all this Motown music came along. We’ve also gone with caps. Shit loads of awful caps.”

“But above all else we want you to look thick in our clothes. Really fucking thick.”

EDL’s creative team had originally planned for models to arrive in Hyde on horseback whilst brandishing swords but a lack of funds meant that they had to settle for a few rented minibuses from Salford Van Hire.

At 11am this morning around two dozen models exited the vehicles and proceeded to wander around the pub car park in the new clothing range whilst drinking cans of Carling and talking bollocks. They then went home.

It seems that fashion critics were left confused and unimpressed with what they saw.

André Leon Talley is a former editor of Vogue magazine and a current judge on US television programme America’s Next Top Model.

“Flags? Seriously? Honey, the only people who should be sporting flags on their clothing are Spice Girls and Canadians. And the last time I saw that amount of man-made fibres in one place was at a Cher Lloyd gig. Not for me darling.”

Designer and former Clothes Show presenter Jeff Banks was equally scathing.

“Where do I start?”, sighed Banks. “The models were dreadful. Do you see Gucci employing receding, 17-stone, tattooed neanderthals to wear their clothes? Of course not.

“And the male models were just as bad”, he added.

Greater Manchester Police confirmed that 11 arrests were made at the fashion launch. It is thought that all of them were for Lonsdale related incidents.

The EDL collection will be exclusively available from April in all Luton branches of JD Sports.


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One Comment on “NEWS | New collection from fashion house EDL is panned by critics in Hyde”

  1. Luciana Says:

    Incredible! This blog looks exactly like my old one!

    It’s on a totally different topic but it has pretty much
    the same page layout and design. Excellent choice of colors!


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