NEWS | Manchester City Council announce Coldplay silences

February 6, 2012



Manchester residents are being encouraged to wear purple ribbons to raise public awareness of the dangers of Coldplay. All proceeds raised will go towards helping some really fucking cool bands get new equipment.

Manchester City Council have bowed to public pressure and agreed to hold a one minute silence on both the 9th and 10th June 2012 to pay respect to the 65,000 people who will attend Coldplay concerts at the Etihad Stadium in Manchester over the two days.

“It seems the right thing to do”, said Labour Councillor Harold Trenman. “We listened to Manchester residents on this issue and quickly realised that this was something that there was strong and passionate public feeling about. Tens of thousands of people will sit through hours of some of the dullest music on earth and it’s only right that we think about the brave sacrifice they are making.”

Users of the social networking site Facebook set up a group entitled ‘Show Respect For Coldplay Fans’. The online community attracted over 350,000 members and called for Manchester City Council to do something to recognise the people set to attend one of the stadium boreathons.

“I’m glad the authorities have finally come to their senses and agreed to do something”, said campaign organiser Michelle Fisher.

“People just don’t understand what attendees of these concerts will go through. My cousin went to a Coldplay gig in 2009 where the band callously performed a medley of the songs In My Place, Clocks and Fix You. He slipped in to a coma and has unfortunately never regained consciousness. We owe it to people like my cousin to show some respect in June with just a minute’s silence to think about the fallen. And if this one small act just stops a single person from going to a future Coldplay gig then our sacrifice will have been worth it.”

Music fan Wayne Gormal from Hulme is in complete agreement.

“I think it’s only right that we take a minute to think about those who are attending”, said Wayne. “My friend Jenny is going. I tried to talk her out of it, but I couldn’t get her to see what she was getting herself in to. She just kept saying things like, “I like that one with the piano in it”, and stuff like that. So I’ll probably bow my head for a minute and think of my friend Jenny. I just hope she makes it through.”

Prestwich resident Chrissy Elliot sees things slightly differently. “I’ll probably put some really good music on for those minutes. Maybe a bit of old-school hip hop, or some of the amazing post-rock that we’ve seen come out of Ireland over the past couple of years. This isn’t me being disrespectful. I just think I’d prefer to remember these people in a more happy and positive way. My thoughts will still be with any poor, brave souls who attend either night of horror.”

A free and confidential hotline will be set up a week before the concerts for anyone worried or affected by Chris Martin.


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2 Comments on “NEWS | Manchester City Council announce Coldplay silences”

  1. Keith from bury Says:

    How much silence do have to do for actually entering the Fu@@@@g place .?



  1. laughter - Page 17 - February 28, 2012

    […] Blog Entries138 NEWS | Manchester City Council announce Coldplay silences | newsmanc “People just don’t understand what attendees of these concerts will go through. My […]

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